At the beginning of 2024, I decided that I would abstain from alcohol for the month of January as part of the Dry January campaign. It has now been 6 months and I am still not drinking!
For those who don’t know, Dry January is a campaign by Alcohol Change UK, which started in 2013. The campaign is now running in a number of other countries.
Why Mike? Why?
To be frank, I’ve never seen the point of Dry January. I mean you pick the month after everyone has been partying hard. They all want a break after that anyway!
If you really want a challenge, then do Dry December!
However, in hindsight, isn’t that the point of the campaign? It’s about giving your body a break. And January is the best time for it.
The fact was, I had no intention of taking a break from drinking. It all happened on a whim.
Firstly, I am not an alcoholic. People did tell me I was, and it did make me question my intake. Truth be told, I did feel like I was becoming a little dependent at times.
If I had a bad day at work (and I’ve had many of them recently), I would head to the wine.
On nights out, once I started drinking, I wouldn’t stop. So I would get obliterated and not remember what happened. Then you would be full of regret and panic wondering what you did the night before.
I would let myself get into those states because I would know I wouldn’t be affected the next day. I’m one of those lucky people who doesn’t get hangovers!
However, I could say no, and I did at times. I have done dry weeks and months before, even to prove a point!
Party month
As I said, December is a party month, and in 2023 I went hard. I had probably been going hard a lot longer before then.
On New Year’s Eve, I got so drunk that I couldn’t remember some of the night. The husby had to snap me out of it to bring in the new year. I didn’t have my inaugural dram of whiskey at the stroke of midnight!
For the rest of the night I stayed on the water, and the next day I decided to take a break from alcohol.
I wasn’t intending to tell people about it, but a week later I was out for a mate’s birthday, and I didn’t want the temptation of people asking if I wanted a drink. So I just said I was doing Dry January!
“You’re boring!”
Generally, when I tell people that I’m not drinking, it has been positive, although there are times when it’s been a little uncomfortable.
The most common negative response is that I’m boring now.
Being told that they want Drunk Mike back and that they prefer Drunk Mike over Sober Mike is quite hurtful.
I know that Sober Mike is more quiet and introverted, but this is the real me, so it makes me feel like no one likes me for who I really am.
Really?
There were a few people who tried to pressure me to drink, or give me alcoholic drinks knowing I was not drinking!
I mean, the lack of respect at times was unbelievable. I shouldn’t need to explain or defend my decision not to drink.
But to try and force me to drink. Really?
Does he have beef with me?
The funniest one was when someone thought they had upset me.
Some people appear to only know confident Drunk Mike, so when they meet quiet Sober Mike, I think it is a shock to them.
The husby was asked if I was upset with them because I was being so different. He had to explain that they had done nothing wrong.
Sorry, it’s just the introverted version you’re meeting. And you are likely to meet them more often.
That isn’t to say that Sober Mike can’t be confident. I am comfortable with people I know and in small groups. Just large groups, I can become a little more inside myself and very conscious of my surroundings.
My thoughts
If truth be told, I didn’t think I’d be able to complete Dry January, let alone nearly 7 months without needing a drink, but here I am.
Options
My biggest concern was how I would handle situations where I would normally drink. Stressed after work, socialising with friends or even a night out. And most recently, how would I deal with drinking while on holiday?
Would there be a suitable alternative? Yes, but it’s still limited.
There is a small selection of alcohol-free drinks, generally beer and cider. But there is also low stock!
During Dry January, a venue, *cough* Lane 7 *cough*, ran out of alcohol-free alternatives! I know these alternatives are probably not their biggest sellers, but during a nationwide campaign like Dry January, you’d think they would top up!
There was another venue that also ran out. Although, it was a social club in February, so they can be forgiven!
I am not a big soft drink person, but on occasion needs must. I did widen my horizons by drinking alcohol-free ciders, just to give me a bit of variety.
Holiday
I was super anxious for this holiday, as I wasn’t sure what the drinking situation would be like, or whether I would want to drink.
The alcohol-free drinks were limited, but there was availability. so I had nothing to worry about there. There was a tostada beer that I kept on having which was tasty.
I also found a really nice alcohol-free white wine. Granted it was the only alcohol-free one I found and it had a price to match.
I just want a nice…
…cold draft pint. Drinking from a bottle just isn’t the same. Plus, they don’t last as long as a pint, yet cost the same price!
Also, I miss wine. Especially red wine! There are alternatives out there, but they don’t compete with the ‘real’ stuff.
Red wine…are fucking awful! I just want a really good alcohol-free red wine. If anyone knows of one, please let me know.
I also learnt that I am allergic to Kylie’s Zero Sparkling Rose. So that is definitely off my drink list, which is a shame as I did like it!
There is/was a new pop-up bar in Manchester that is alcohol-free, but I haven’t ventured into it. When the majority/all of your mates drink, getting them to go to this kind of venue is near impossible.
Changes in me
One of the questions I am asked is whether I have seen any changes in myself since I stopped drinking. Truthfully, I don’t know how to respond. There have been changes, but have they come from not drinking?
Mental health-wise, Fucked Up Mike is still there, and I am still anxious, stressed and unhappy at work. But my sanity hasn’t changed due to my alcohol intake changing.
In relation to my fitness, yes there has been an improvement since the beginning of the year, but I wouldn’t say it is entirely down to my long Dry January stint.
Since moving gyms last year, my body has been going through a transformation. Before the new year, I had already lost nearly 10kg. My weight loss this year is nowhere near the same. But weight loss isn’t my main focus.
I would say, body fat has reduced, and there is a possibility that I may get it to 20% before the end of the year. Now this is what I want to see.
The subcutaneous fat (the fat just under the skin) has seen the biggest change. Previously, it would hardly move, but I have seen a consistent reduction this year, losing a total of 1.7%.
Maybe this is linked to my drinking habits. Maybe it’s the fact that I have been eating more fruit. Using supplements. Or that I have been pushing myself more at the gym.
Confidence
Once you have had a little bit to drink, your inhibitions tend to drop. Drunk Mike was like that too. I would say he is quite confident and extroverted.
Without a drink, I’m the total opposite! Unless I know you well, or in a close environment, I can be quiet and go into myself.
And I do kind of miss the confident side. I would like to be more of a “I don’t give a fuck what people think” person. But I’m not. I don’t want to spend hours afterwards rehashing what was said and done to make sure I didn’t embarrass myself. But I do!
The problem is, now that I am the sober one I can become very aware of my surrounding environment, and how the actions from myself and the people I am with affects other people.
There was a night out where the second-hand embarrassment was so much that I had to leave. And it wasn’t because the people I were with was having a good time. I think the reason is, that people looking our way, and as the sober one I can see the judgey eyes, so it affects my anxiety.
And sometimes that embarrassment isn’t from someone I know. While in a bar, there was a guy that was so shitfaced that he was just causing a scene and being a nusance to everyone, that I got extrememly embarassed for him! Why am I like that?
Hermit
While I still socialise, it’s definitely not to the level that it was previously.
To be truthfull, since lockdown my nights out diminished to low numbers. This year, I can count on one hand the number of nights I have been out out.
While I can blame some of my hermit lifestyle down to the husby’s job, I think the above is partly to blame too. I’ve been told I’m not a fun person to be around when out, so it’s just best to stay in then!
What does the future hold?
Firstly, I am happy on the path that I am currently on. Although, that doesn’t mean that I won’t have a drink in the future. Just at the moment, I don’t want one.
Also, I haven’t quit drinking. I’ve just stopped. Quitting feels like there is more pressure put on yourself, but stopping means I just take each day as it comes.
What I do know, is that I don’t want to go back into the cycle or the states that I was previously. Part of me is concerned that if I did start drinking again, then I would get back into the old habits that I had.
Ideally, the occasional drink would be nice. So the latest trend is “Zebra Striping” where you alternative between alcohol and non-alcoholic.
I would also like to see more alcohol-free alternatives in bars, maybe even a draft beer. If there was more choice than the need for niche alcohol-free bars wouldn’t be needed.
Also, the one thing I would love to see in the future is people not being questioned on why they aren’t drinking. People should just be able to go out have a good time, and not have people keep on bringing it up, questioning it, or even trying to put someone down for not drinking!